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"Philly Comics Alien Cheesesteak Abduction" Tee
$32.99
Why settle for the same old boring, generic merch everyone else has? Stand out from the Fanatics-wearin' sheep and "get goated" with PhillyGOAT! Designed by local artists. Worn by legends. 🔔🐐❤️🥨🦅
⚠️ WARNING: May cause unsolicited compliments from other Philadelphia sports fans. Do not wear if you don't like being high-five. 🙌
Established in 2020, we've proudly served over 100,000 satisfied customers from the Greater Philadelphia area and beyond, and we've earned close to 10,000 5-star reviews. ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
And we're making headlines! We've been featured in the Philadelphia Inquirer, CBS Philadelphia, Fox 29 Philadelphia, and DelcoToday just to name a few.
We take the pressure off of ordering. Don't like what you got? Simply return it for free within 30 days, no questions asked. 🤝
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We've all heard the recent reports of UFO sightings and classified extra-terrestrial information soon to be released by our government. But what is it that the aliens are after??
We've partnered with the fictional Philly Comics company to put forth one theory. In this inaugural issue cover we get a War of the Worlds-esque depiction of the aliens' motives. This design imagines that the aliens have come to do something far far worse than destroy our civilization... they've come to take our Philly cheesesteaks! What a cruel fate for humanity... We'd rather be abducted and probed in our nether regions than go without our favorite whiz wit'.
*This product is made especially for you as soon as you place an order, which is why it may take us up to 1-2 weeks to deliver it to you. Making products on demand instead of in bulk helps reduce overproduction, so thank you for making thoughtful purchasing decisions and for supporting small businesses.
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Say hello to your new favorite t-shirt: the Bella Canvas 3001. Once you put this sucker on, you're gonna be like a fat kid at the pool 'cause you'll just never wanna take it off. This best-selling unisex tee is everything you've dreamed of and more - soft, lightweight, just the right amount of stretch, and flattering for all. So comfortable that I've told my family to bury me in one of these jawns once my toxic relationship with Philly sports eventually kills me.
- Designed by real Philadelphians after a few rounds of Yuengling to inspire creativity
- 100% combed and ring-spun cotton (heathers are a cotton / poly blend) for a pre-shrunk fabric so soft and lightweight we challenge you not to hold it against your cheek whilst saying, “ooooohhhh… aaahhhhhhh…”
- Unisex, retail fit that feels just like a hug from Mike Schmidt's mustache
- Classic crewneck style because v-necks are more of a douchey NYC / L.A. thing
- Printed with certified, eco-friendly ink (unlike our competitors whose inks are loaded with pesticides, asbestos, and plutonium).
- Phillygoat branded logo on left sleeve so you know it's not a cheap knock-off
- Definitely not made in a sweatshop, but we are looking into ways we can force the children of Cowboys fans into cheap labor
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We print all of our designs using only the highest quality inks and finest threads in the game so that your shirt is both eye-popping and long-lasting. Follow these instructions carefully to keep that jawn looking like new for as long as possible:
- Machine wash cold, inside-out on a gentle cycle with like colors
- Use a mild detergent
- Use non-chlorine bleach only when necessary
- Do not use any fabric softeners
- Do not dry-clean
- Hang-dry works best to avoid shrinkage, but can be tumble-dried on a low cycle as needed
- If ironing, use cool iron inside-out. Do not iron the print.
- Do not attempt to eat, snort, or use as a suppository