Artisinally crafted using Mike Schmidt's mustache hairs | 30-Day Free Returns | Satisfaction Guaranteed (*Except Cowboys Fans)

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  • "🐍 Philly Soccer 🐍" Youth/Teen Premium Jersey Tee

    • Snakeskin + lightning bolt = awesomeness for your teen. We've outdone ourselves with this design that's sure to turn heads and get people talking about how your offspring is the coolest kid in school (because that's what this is all about, right??). Meant for young Philly soccer hooligans, you're kid's gonna wanna doop it up all the time in this instant classic jersey tee.

      See more jawns like this in our Philly Soccer Collection.

      *This product is made especially for you as soon as you place an order, which is why it may take us up to 1-2 weeks to deliver it to you. Making products on demand instead of in bulk helps reduce overproduction, so thank you for making thoughtful purchasing decisions and for supporting small businesses.

    • Say hello to your teen's new favorite t-shirt β€” it's super smooth, super comfortable, and made from a cotton touch polyester jersey that won't fade after washing.

      1. Designed by real Philadelphians after a few rounds of Yuengling to inspire creativity
      2. 95% polyester, 5% elastane in a premium knit mid-weight jersey fabric that's so soft and lightweight we challenge you not to hold it against your cheek whilst saying, β€œooooohhhh… aaahhhhhhh…”
      3. Classic retail fit that feels just like a hug from Mike Schmidt's mustache
      4. Classic crewneckΒ style because v-necks are more of a douchey NYC / L.A. thing
      5. Printed with certified, eco-friendly ink (unlike our competitors whose inks are loaded with pesticides, asbestos, and plutonium).
      6. Phillygoat branded logo on left sleeve so you know it's not a cheap knock-off
      7. Definitely not made in a sweatshop, but we are looking into ways we can force the children of Cowboys fans into cheap labor
    • We print all of our designs using only the highest quality inks and finest threads in the game so that your shirt is both eye-popping and long-lasting. Follow these instructions carefully to keep that jawn looking like new for as long as possible:

      1. Machine wash cold, inside-out on a gentle cycle with like colors
      2. Use a mild detergent
      3. Use non-chlorine bleach only when necessary
      4. Do not use any fabric softeners
      5. Do not dry-clean
      6. Hang-dry works best to avoid shrinkage, but can be tumble-dried on a low cycle as needed
      7. If ironing, use cool iron inside-out. Do not iron the print.
      8. Do not attempt to eat, snort, or use as a suppository
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