Pat Burrell Is My Biological Father Tee

Size Guide
  • Pat Burrell played in Philadelphia from 2000 to 2008 and was legendary for rounding the bases on and off the field (wink, wink...). Ladies really dug Pat's long ball and Clooney-esque features, so if you were born in Philly during the early aughts and have a square jaw line, there is a pretty decent chance that Pat the Bat is your biological father.

    See more jawns like this in our Philly Baseball Collection.

    1. Designed by real Philadelphians after a few rounds of Yuengling to inspire creativity
    2. Classic crewneck t-shirt because v-necks are more of a douchey NYC / L.A. thing
    3. Cotton / poly fabric blend for a shirt so soft and lightweight we challenge you not to hold it against your cheek whilst saying, “ooooohhhh… aaahhhhhhh…”
    4. Printed with a special ink fade for a more vintage look
    5. Relaxed unisex fit that you’ll never want to take off, like a fat kid at the pool
    6. Definitely not made in a sweatshop, but we are looking into ways we can force the children of Cowboys fans into cheap labor
  • We print all of our designs using only the highest quality inks and finest threads in the game so that your shirt is both eye-popping and long-lasting. Here's how to keep that jawn looking like new for as long as possible:

    1. Machine wash: warm (max 40C or 105F)
    2. Non-chlorine: bleach as needed
    3. Tumble dry: low heat
    4. Iron, steam or dry: medium heat
    5. Do not dryclean
    6. Do not attempt to eat, snort, or use as a suppository
Color
Solid White Blend
Athletic Heather
Heather Red
Heather True Royal
Solid Black Blend
Size

Customer Reviews

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P
Patches
Dad?

I’ve gotten so many questions about if I’m actually his son I’m starting to believe it. Hopefully this shirt will reunite us.